Happy New Year, friends and family, and guests who follow - or chance upon - my blog! Thank you for being part of my 2009!

To those I have let down, I am sorry. Please give me another chance next year.

To those I’ve made promises to and never kept – it was not deliberate but I will ‘improve’ in 2010. Promise.

To those whom I might have ignored or breezed by because I was in a hurry - I will try to slow down and take my time next year.

To those I owe dinners, lunches, night out, teas, etc. I’ll fix that, I’ll make time. For sure.

To those who have made me smile through those difficult times, thank you!

To those who prayed for me, even those not knowing me personally, I salute you!

To those who, when I was feeling my lowest, hugged me and told me they cared, you are precious!

To those I’ve disagreed with, argued with and just never got along with…well, I’m sorry. Let’s try again next year.

Those that I’ve hurt, intentionally or unintentionally, I’m sorry again.

You made 2009 a great year for me. I wish you and your loved ones prosperity, good health, wealth, happiness, abundant blessings. May 2010 be the year you achieve great and wonderful things in God’s guidance and strength.

Christmas 2009

Today I woke up wondering what should I give my children for Christmas gifts. They are 27 and 22 years old respectively, both single and still living with us. They are both in transition: the elder in between jobs and contemplating of going back to school. The younger one has just finished college and is currently applying for a job after, hopefully, passing the licensure examination.

Since they are both adults now we feel that they need to feel what real life is really about. My husband and I (mainly I) were thinking that maybe we had overprotected them and made life easy for them. We decided that they must experience a little more hardship in order for them to appreciate life a little more.

So here am I this early Christmas morning, contemplating on what I should give them this Christmas. Okay, the right phrase should be "how much I should give them." It is too late for Christmas shopping - and I did not want to add to their already full closets or give them things that they do not need or even want.

Well, before I get out of bed, I should have something concrete. Shall I give them a few dollar bills as I vowed to myself several times in the past? Or just a Christmas card, or a Christmas letter - after all, it is the thought that counts, isn't it?

The more I thought and prayed about it, I realize I cannot do that, despite my vows, or however they have performed in the past. My mother's heart could not afford to do it - Christmas is about giving - not punishing. And surely it will not make me any happier.

What affirmed this idea was the thought that God loves me and is heaping favor upon favor on me, and is continually filling my life with blessings. There is no doubt that I had disappointed Him countless times in the past and in the present too, yet He does not hesitate to lavish extravagant gifts on me. He allowed His only Son to suffer pain and hardship that I hardly know about, just so I may have a chance to be with Him for eternity. Even now when I do not talk to Him for the whole day but spend time in such silly activities such as facebooking, He is always there, ready- and longing- to give me what I need most: comfort, guidance, wisdom, perceptive heart, hope - whatever my need happens to be.

Being a parent made me understand God's heart a little bit more. Several times He was fuming over the rebellion, defiance and stupidity of His favored people, the Israelites, yet in His next breath, He promises to take care of them, to restore to them what they lost. He pleads with them to return to Him, because He knows this is their best chance to overcome the enemy. Oh, what love!

So here am I, preparing my simple gift to my young adult children, the ones the Lord gave me to love. The amount I am preparing is several times more than what I had originally intended - small, yet this will substantially reduce my already depleted 'net worth.' But I know this will make me happy, after all, I am a recipient of so much more favor, blessings and love.

They say that there are 2 kinds of gratefulness: the sudden, ecstatic kind you feel when you receive, and the long-lasting joy you experience when you give. No wonder God never stop giving. To Him, everyday is Christmas!

Merry Christmas, everyone!